Jivon Deesha Copyright © All Rights Reserved
How did you feel when you first started the coaching programme?
I was bored, frustrated and feeling stuck. I felt I was never going anywhere and it was just really demotivating because I felt like I couldn’t do anything. It was about not knowing how to change things.
What was your job like at that time?
It was very repetitive, very boring. There was a lack of training and development opportunities. And I didn’t have a good relationship with my boss or with my colleagues. I was doing something that I had no interest in and it had no job satisfaction.
Part of the main thing was that it was a company in the commercial sector which I didn’t want to be in. There were only a small range of tasks which were not challenging. I remember I would literally sit there with my chin on my hand and once my colleague passed by and commented on how bored I looked!
What kind of person would you say you were you back then?
I was all over the place, more disorganised and often feeling muddled up. For example, when I did that particular goal setting exercise with you, the first time I did it, it was massive! There was so much stuff on it. Then when I did it again two years later, it was much more focussed with only two bits on it.
Nowadays, things I’ve done recently are all a lot more focussed. I would say I’m 100% more focussed now.
What made you decide to have coaching?
I was feeling stuck in a rut and very disorganised in my mind. I felt like I couldn’t see what to do and I needed someone to guide me.
What happened when you first started the coaching?
I think I was a lot more clueless then. I wanted to get help and put it all in someone else’s hands. Since then, I’ve taken on more responsibility, learned to gradually help myself more and I learned to use the tools from the coaching. I’ve become more confident.
What were the first coaching sessions like?
I learned how to envision an ideal for what I wanted. Then, it felt like it was all a fantasy. I thought I could never achieve that. Other people might be able to but not me.
What was your coaching journey/experience like?
It’s been so challenging. I’ve learned so much and I am a much stronger person now. I did a job that I didn’t like. I had a period of job hunting and temp working. Now, I am tougher and can stand up for myself now.
I now know what I have learnt from these experiences and why they happened to me!
I worked with my crazy boss so that I could learn to forgive people and learn to stand up for myself. I also learned how to become more efficient and prepare for anything! Leaving my job and temping, I learned that I can survive hard times and keep going and put myself forward for rejection again and again to get what I want. I learned how to survive on little money and budget, which I used to be terrible at. I learned not to care what people thought of my job situation. Temping, I have learned to be very flexible and adaptable and working with kids at the college I have toughened up a bit and learned to not care if they don't like me or what I tell them! I also learned that even when someone seems tough or like a bully it is because they are going through something themselves (so many kids like this) and that really I am very lucky to have the upbringing and opportunities I have had. So you see, I have to admit that you were always right about things in the end.... and what is more I am glad about everything that has happened!
How have you progressed emotionally and mentally?
Actually, I was on anti-depressants for a long time. I am now nearly off them. My doctor has helped to slowly decrease them and soon I shall stop altogether. I am never going back to them!
I’ve since learned there are other ways to deal with things.
Back then, I would have procrastinated for weeks to get something done. There was big fear of failure which stopped me doing things. Now, I just do it. I am a lot more focussed.
How do you feel about your current job?
I am learning a lot more and I’ve got a lot more opportunities. It’s good to put forward my own ideas in the team. I am much braver about that. And in taking the initiative.
I would say that I am happy at work, about 8 out of 10, on a good day.
I have the best boss in the world! Recently, she said ‘I really like your ideas and creativity’. This is so important to me and such a change from the way I was treated in the past.
What kind of things did you learn during the coaching?
I learnt a lot from Nazish about the job hunting process and feel very confident about this now. She showed my how to make my CV more appealing and eye catching and to adapt it for different jobs. She has given me great practise interviews twice (both times I got the job including the job I am in now which I am really enjoying). She taught me how to do a skills audit which gave me a confidence boost when looking for jobs and showed me that I did have lots of skills.
Nazish also has taught me an abundance of tips and techniques for building my confidence and self-esteem, for managing stress and dealing with difficult situations at work.
She also showed me many different techniques for achieving my goals and how to develop my plans towards them. I am a lot more focused and happy with my direction since then.
She even helped me with my wardrobe and style and showed me which colours and styles suit my colouring and shape and I've become a more confident, smart dresser. In short, almost any area of your life which you want to change, Nazish has a whole host of tools, tips and techniques to help!
What advice would you give to someone who might be thinking of getting coaching?
I would say, definitely do something different. I would recommend coaching if you are trying to work out your direction. It’s better to be bold and take risks, take a leap and do something that is a bit scary.
How is your level of confidence now, on a scale of 1 to 10?
Back then it was about 2 out of 10. Now, I am about 7-8 out of 10.
One of the things I have noticed is that I do not need to be the centre of attention anymore. I am quite happy to just take part with others, get along and I don’t care so much what other people think.
Now, how do you feel about your goals for the future?
Now, I think it can become reality. I can see how things can happen. I can definitely imagine having my dream future.
I still do some of my arty things and want to follow my long-term plans. And I still practice my everyday exercises that I learned.
If you never had the coaching, would you have progressed this far, in this short a time?
No. Definitely, a 100% not. I would never have done any of those things if I had not had coaching.
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Sophie had life coaching between August 2011 – March 2014.
Her original Goals were:
To get clarity of career direction and move towards a more fulfilling job.
To gain more self confidence.
To be less confused and more focussed. Used to start many projects and not finish them.
To be less stressed and more organised.
(The name 'Sophie' has been used here in order to protect privacy. All pictures were created by and property of Sophie.)